The world is so much stranger than any fiction anyone could create.

Below is a link to...wow...a story on Wattpad (which is a "writing community in which users are able to post articles, stories, and poems about anything either online or through the Wattpad app" aka LiveJournal 4.0) which as far as I can tell consists completely of a self-insertion one-to-one transcription of the dialogue of Guardians of the Galaxy by a ESL 14-year-old with a learning disability.

Look at this tangle of thorns

http://www.wattpad.com/65424071-guardians-of-the-galaxy-chapter-5